IRENA MALENAKOVA V. PRINCESS
Princess and Irena first met in the ring on LIWA DIVA DAY, the LIWA Monday Night Show, on July 7, 2003. They met in Princess' first match back after an injury. The match was Irena's first in the LIWA and it was a loser leaves match. Princess was fighting Irena for her old spot on the roster.
Moolah: We have a debut up next!
The sound of a howling wolf breaks the arena and fills the arena. The video screenflashes to life and the words ICE MAIDEN suddenly appear as the sound system starts to pound out "Empire" by Queensryche. As the song's introduction plays ICE MAIDEN fades and is replaced by the words NA SHAGAT' NET that appear on the screen one at a time.
Mae: Welcome to a newcomer in Irena Malenakova! NYET NYET DA DA!
Moolah: Oh PLEASE don't pretend you speak Russian. You don't.
Mae: How do you know? Have you checked?
Irena Malenakova makes her grand entrance stoicly walking without looking at the fans. She takes her time getting to the ring, and starts stretching and hopping up and down in preparation for her match.
Mae: Aw...animal control wouldn't let her bring the dogs.
Moolah: Irena Malenakova, has a chance here to win a permanent spot on the LIWA roster, but she has to get through a very tough woman do to so, and that is Princess.
Mae: Vostok!
“Line Em' Up” By Freeway hits the speakers, and Princess makes her way out behind the curtains, making her way down the ramp with an uncharacteristic smile on her face. She stops on the way to the ring to pose for a picture from a fan holding up a "BASTARDS! THEY'RE ALL BASTARDS!" sign before climbing up the ring steps.
Moolah: Princess is taking her sweet time getting ready to take on Ms. Malenakova.
Mae: They say the best things in life are well worth the wait.
Moolah: Like a colonoscopy. Yay!
The referee calls for the bell to ring! The two lock-up with Princess getting the early advantage. Princess pulls Irena's head into a head-lock position taking her to the ground, then lets go smiling at her. Princess shakes her head a bit...and offers her hand to Irena to shake! Irena slaps it away, and Princess turns to the fans to shrug… Irena Malenakova runs up to Princess giving her a old fashion roll up pin!
1....
2...
THR-KICK OUT!
Moolah: Princess is trying to be a fair woman these days, and it almost cost her right off the bat!
Mae: I just don't know if I can love her as much if she's not calling everyone a bastard!
Moolah: Do you really believe that?
Mae: Nah, not really. But, that’s what us color commentators do. We lie, and cheat and steal.
Moolah: Steal? Is that where my dentures went? OPEN YOUR MOUTH
Mae: MM MMM!
Moolah: Grrr...
Back in the ring, Irena Malenakova jumps back and measures up Princess as she rises. Princess pulls her elbow pad up and charges at Irena. Malenakova side steps and Princess stops herself before hitting the turnbuckle, Princess stomps on the mat angrily and turns around receiving a clothesline by Irena Malenakova.
Moolah: Princess has to get her act together, and quick! Otherwise, she'll lose this match, and that will be the end of Princess in the LIWA.
Mae: Irena Malenakova wants to make an impact. If she wins here, her singles career could start to skyrocket.
Once to her feet, Malenakova marches over to a dizzy Princess and backs her up in the corner-Irish whipping her to the far turnbuckle! Irena charges at Princess with a second clothesline but Princess ducks and moves out the way making Irena slam hand on the turnbuckle. Irena grabs her chest and turns around walking into a big boot from Princess knocking her back into the corner. Irena Malenakova falls down to the canvas and Princess backs up to the other corner and charges toward Irena Malenakova.
Moolah: Princess, getting a head of steam…
Mae: Baseball slide drop kick!
Princess pulls herself off of Irena and raises her opponent to her feet. With clubbing blows, she sits Malenakov up on the turnbuckle and goes up high...hitting her with a Superplex-Princess covers Irena!
Moolah: WHAT IMPACT! This could be it!
1…
2…
KICKOUT!
Mae: I don’t like Princess anymore, Moolah. Look at her going right back to work on Irena. If this was the "old" Princess, she'd be throwing a tantrum and pushing the referee around.
Moolah: Oh yes, that was a BIG improvement, wasn't it.
Princess lifts Malenakova up by the hair, and throws her into the ropes…on the way back catching her and hitting her with a powerful power slam! Princess then drops a elbow drop on the stomach and going into a pinning position, hooking the leg-
1...
2...
Thr-KICK OUT !
Mae: Wow, look at Irena! Look at that kick out! With power! We should hire a Russian for the LIWA!
Moolah: Alzheimer’s kicking in again, Mae? We've had two in the past. Natayla and HBC 2.0.
Princess looks kinda mad...but she takes a deep breath and lifts Irena up and Irish whips the still stunned Malenakova into the corner. She lifts up her to the top and Princess signals for the Big Time.
Moolah: Princess is signaling for her finisher…I think she's ready to put this one away!
Mae: Ah, Big Time...Baron Biggy Von Jiggy...She named her move after him so she must want him really really bad.
Moolah: Um, ew…
Princess grabs Irena by the neck and starts to jump off. But Malenakova gains the strength and pushes her off, to the canvas below! Princess hits hard, landing right on her chest! Irena Malenakova then stands high in the air and jumps off with a big senton drop! She lands in the sitting position right on Princess’s back! Turning her over, she covers Princess…
1…
2... KICKOUT!
Mae: Close! That was close! Malenakova knocked the wind right out of Princess with that senton splash and almost put her royal highness away!
Moolah: Close but not quite enough to finish the deal. What strong offense we’ve seen from Irena Malenakova in this match so far.
Mae: It’s almost as strong as her perfume. I can smell her from here. She sorta smells like um...something Russian I can joke about. Snow?
Both women rise to their feet and exchange rights and lefts, Irena now gaining the early advantage… She kicks Princess in the midsection and drops her head down to the canvas with a DDT! Irena Malenakova rolls over and covers Princess once again!
1...
2...KICK OUT!
Moolah: Two kickouts in a row from Princess. Irena’s having a little trouble putting her away.
Mae: I think she’s having trouble getting a good cover having to lean over those enormous breasts.
Moolah: Actually, that could be a part of the problem.
Irena Malenakova rises to her feet and walks over to the the turnbuckle. As the referee checks on Princess, she starts to unravel the turnbuckle pad revealing the metal!
Moolah: Uh oh, Irena has some desparate intentions going on…I think she just wants this match over, and she'll do anything to get the job finished, because it means a job in the greatest wrestling federation going today!
Finally, the referee turns towards her and notices! The ref runs up to Irena screaming at her to put it back on, but Irena drops the pad on the floor and goes for Princess. Princess grabs the ankle of Malenakova and drags her in a quick ankle lock!
Moolah: Princess got just enough time to recover! She’s got that ankle wrenched…She’s taking Irena off her feet!
The ref takes his attention away from the exposed turnbuckle and back on the match. Malenakova moans in pain as she tries to reverse but a mad Princess wouldn't let her... Princess locks it in harder!
Moolah: Princess has that move wrenched in…Irena’s going for the ropes! She’s a few inches away still…
Mae: Malenakova, using her elbows to walk across the ring to the ropes! She’s really bearing in there!
Irena Malenakova tries to grab the rope but is to far away from it! Princess screams in anger locking in the anklelock harder....Irena struggles...and finally manages to turn around! She puts a foot in Princess's chest, and kicks her off!
Moolah: She's free! Now's her chance, if she can shake off the pain of that hold!
Irena pulls herself up-and, out of nowhere-SEVERE RUSSIAN LEGSWEEP!
Mae: Siberian Express! It was a part of the USSR, after all!
Moolah: She planted Princess! COVER!
1!
2!
3!!!
Here is your winner, Irena Malenakov!
Irena has her hand raised, and pushes hair out of her eyes as she breathes hard. She rolls out of the ring as the referee tends to Princess.
Moolah: According to the stipulations of the match, then...that's it for Princess. This is her last LIWA match!
Mae: Poor bastard...
The referee tells Princess she lost, and Princess looks at her in disbelief. She pulls herself up on the ropes as the fans applaud her, and her lower lip starts to quiver...
Moolah: I don't believe this, but Princess is crying. All of her dreams of reforming herself have shattered here, tonight.
Mae: Here come the guards to drag her away for trespassing, since only LIWA competitors are allowed in the ring...
Moolah: That's not a guard, you idiot. That's Shayla Matthews! It's Ms. Keane's personal assistant!
Shayla enters the ring as Princess is wiping away tears of disappointment. She takes Princess's shoulder and turns her around...and whispers something in her ear. Princess gulps, and nods...and the two depart the ring together.
Moolah: What was that about?
Mae: Party at Shay-shay's house?
Moolah: Yeah right...Helga is standing by with our...esteemed Directrixes.....or Directrix squared, or...whatever. Helgs?